Hello dear Brave one!

Here is this week’s spotlight on Relationship OCD :

Relationship OCD is characterized by recurrent and persistent intrusive (unwanted) thoughts, urges or images about the quality of relationships along with compulsive, repetitive behaviors or mental acts aimed at reducing anxiety/distress or preventing a feared outcome from happening, all of which cause distress and impairment in functioning.

Common obsessions:

-Excessive doubt about loving a partner “enough”

-Excessive concern with quality of relationships

-Intrusive thoughts about being in the wrong relationship

-What if I am meant to be with someone else? Is my partner really “the one”?

-What if I don’t really love my partner? Do I love them enough? Do I love them but I’m not IN love with them?

-What if I cheat on my partner? What if my partner cheats or has cheated on me in the past?

-What if none of my friends actually like me and they just feel bad for me?

-What if I lose my best friend because they are in a relationship now? What if my best friend doesn’t care about me?

-Am I attracted to my partner?

-What if I’m in love with my therapist? My best friend? My religious leader?

Common Core Fears:

-Loss of love/people you care about, ending up alone

-Loss of identity: I thought I loved this person/they loved me

-Causing irreversible harm, being a bad person

-Feeling rejected, ashamed, disconnected, inferior

Common compulsions:

-Checking emotions

-Comparing feelings for partner with feelings for someone else


-Rigid rules about friendships

-Mental reviewing/replaying

-Reassurance seeking

**Please note: themes help us get more information out to individuals suffering with OCD, but anything can become obsessive and/or compulsive and themes can overlap. It’s also important to remember that the content of OCD is not important, it’s all the same mechanisms responding to different triggers. We recommend working with a therapist trained in ERP.

Stay Brave! -The OCD MN Team